Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets

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Last weekend I was HYPED about Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets. So excited, in fact, that I did not even take a look at reviews because I wanted the full, unadulterated experience of watching a movie without preconceived notions in my head. Before I get into my review of this movie here is a bit you should know about it…

  • It’s based on the comic book series Valerian and Laureline.
  • It’s directed by Luc Besson.
  • There are HUNDREDS of aliens in it (so many that I won’t be able to cover them here).
  • It’s FUN to watch but lacks some substance.

Valerian, Valerian…where for art thou emotion Valerian?


Major Valerian is a tough, battle hardened military man who does not wear his emotions on his sleeves. He’s a fighter, a brawler and a celebrated Major. In this movie Valerian is played by Dane DeeHan (yes, the guy who played Harry Osborn in the Amazing Spiderman movies). While Dane captures the action really well he doesn’t emote ANYTHING in this movie. I get it, Valerian is tough, but even TOUGH people have expressions on their faces when delivering lines/speaking. During the entire film he spoke as though their were cue cards 5 feet past his visual range that he just couldn’t quite read. Dane’s presentation was SO STIFF that it left me feeling bad for his acting companion (Cara Delevingne, who plays Laureline) because it fell on her to bring ANY emotion to their scenes.

Word of advice Dane: USE YOUR EYEBROWS. Even a hint of a raise now and again would have created so much more connection to Valerian.

Yep…that is Dane’s face the ENTIRE movie.

Badass Women


One thing I TOTALLY have to give kudos to are the number of badass women in Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets. Let’s begin with Sergeant Laureline…

  • She doesn’t take crap from anyone.
  • She can gather her OWN information, thank you very much.
  • She puts Valerian in his place several times.
  • She OWNS being a military woman but also shows compassion for ALL residents of Alpha.
  • She is the ONLY reason Valerian makes the right choice at the end of the movie.

Next is Bubble. Yes, BUBBLE. She is played by Rihanna (yeah…not what I expected but she did a good job).

  • Bubble is unsure of herself but willing to put her life on the line for the greater good.
  • She defends Valerian and Laureline in their time of need.
  • She can transform herself into ANYTHING and ANYONE.
  • She accepts her fate with grace and dignity.

Bubble performing for Valerian.

Last is Princess Lihio-Minaa, of the Pearls of Mul.

  • She is free spirited and kind.
  • She offers companionship and care to the converters of her planet.
  • She faces her demise with absolute strength and sends her memories across space and time to save her people.

Princess Lihio-Minaa with a converter on her shoulder.

Aliens and Plain Fun

Overall this movie is lavishly made with an excess of visual stimuli and some really amazing character development/creation. There is a market in an alternate dimension, a city of a thousand planets in outer space, the ability for travelers to cut in and out of light space…there is just SO MUCH in this movie. What it lacks in a story line it makes up for in its beauty. Here are some snapshots of aliens in Valerian and the City of a Thousand planets…

I would recommend seeing this movie at least once. Even if you don’t go to a theater be sure to stream it (when available) or pick it up at a RedBox as it is most certainly worth viewing. Have fun and Fan Girl on!

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