THIS AUDIOPHOBE DECIDED TO GIVE AUDIOBOOKS ANOTHER TRY

Here’s what happened. . . .

“But I HATE audiobooks.”

That was my initial reaction when Editor Vicki threw out the pitch for an article about listening to audiobooks by someone who doesn’t like them. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve always loved books. Like many of you, dozens of childhood hours were spent hiding under blankets with a flashlight and a pile of new reading. As an adult, it was easy to stay an avid reader during my employment at America’s favorite brick-and-mortar bookstore. Periodicals, art books, nonfiction. . . you name it, I’d read it. Except for audiobooks. I did not like audiobooks.

One of the perks of working at said bookstore was the swag, and I’d gotten my hands on a double CD-set featuring two of Neil Gaiman’s best short stories. A stellar cast, a musical score, and sound effects made these stories more exciting to hear than to read. Unaware that these performances were more akin to radio plays than audiobooks, I bought the audio version of Louis Sachar’s Holes – a book I’d been re-reading obsessively. Imagine my disappointment when I heard only a slight Southern accent from an unknown actor who was was. . . well, READING the book. It took less than 20 minutes for me to tune out and turn off. I tried again with Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone after months of hearing customers extole the magical voice narration of Jim Dale. While more animated, I found Dale’s Professor McGonagall wholly unconvincing. I was also growing impatient with the slow pace of narration. It was frustrating, waiting to hear the words I had previously read at triple the pace. Who had time for this?

Clearly, I decided, audiobooks weren’t for me.

However, years went by, the bookstore closed, and my ferocity for the written word severely diminished. I used to average 30 books a year; now I’m lucky to knock out five. I’d also noticed an increase in the buzz audiobooks were getting. My BFF, a staunch non-reader, was listening to the Harry Potter series and loving it. I noticed people pulling up audiobooks on the bus instead of Candy Crush. After reading several articles on the comeback of audiobooks, I was less skeptical. In this society of glorified busyness, people are making less time for the physical act of reading, yet aren’t willing to give books up. Audiobooks let overwrought readers have their cake and eat it, too. I was convinced – it was time to give audiobooks another shot.

I started with the book I enjoy reading the most – Alice Walker’s The Color Purple. I was doubtful when I discovered it would be read by the author herself. Fast forward to me wiping tears halfway through the preface. I expected to feel bored hearing Ms. Walker read the words I’d read dozens of times before. Instead, her narration and energy made them new again.

Excited, I followed up by listening to a recording of William Goldman’s The Princess Bride. The recording was from an audio cassette version, which provided the perfect mono sound for a story I’d enjoyed since my 80s childhood. Despite the length, I still found myself laughing as hard as ever at the antics of the gentle giant Fezzick and his drunk Spanish compatriot. Just the right amount of cheesy voice acting from Bruce Nelson kept me entertained enough to finish.

E.B. White’s Charlotte’s Web and Gaiman/Pratchett’s Good Omens did not disappoint. Between Martin Jarvis’ dry, hilarious delivery and White’s folksy read, I was no longer missing the bells and whistles of a radio play.

For the last audiobook, I chose my favorite traveling companion – Max Brooks’ World War Z. And if I didn’t like audiobooks before, I did now!!! An all-star voice cast of over three dozen narrators and the addition of music took this epic fictional history and made it legendary. I was convinced – I didn’t hate audiobooks. I’d simply listened to the wrong ones.

There are challenges to listening to an audiobook. It’s easy to lose huge chunks of the story if you’re easily distracted, some narrators are going to make a great story dull, and books by smaller publishers are not going to be as available on audio. That said, there are a few folks on the Internet taking the time to narrate their favorite novels and publishing them for our enjoyment (again, YouTube), and subscription services aplenty to provide audiobooks the library may not carry. With studies showing there is equal benefit to our brain whether we read or listen to a book, there are lots of reasons for anyone who wants to get more reading done to give audiobooks a chance. Try lots of them and try often. You never know which one will catch your ear. Get your earbuds and get to reading.